The last thing…

The last dinner my mum had with us was also the last dinner my mum cooked for us…my dad, my brother, myself and my brother’s girlfriend. Although now I couldn’t really remember what she cooked, I knew that it was one of the few family dinners we had in a long time. It’s really fortunate that we managed to have one on that saturday, on the day before the incident happened the next morning…

The last wonderful dish which my mum cooked was the rendang curry which she tried a new recipe-in-a-packet thingy from the supermarket. it was two weeks ago I think.

The last breakfast I had with my mum at the coffeeshop was…oh no I can’t remember when was that.

One of the last things my mum asked me to do was to check with my officer whether I could take leave on the last week of november to go shanghai for a holiday…and I never managed to get back to her on that…

One of the last things that I wanted to tell my mum was that one of my airforce friends who came our house on friday afternoon commented that the house is very well kept dust-free and clean…

One of the last words which I spoke to my mum the night before, I think, was, ‘ya-lah ya-lah’…

One of the last words which my mum said was, “very pain lah….call the ambulance….”

Now everything seemed like a daze, like a dream, so surreal. Like she has went to work forever and never coming back.

I regret that I’ve taken my mum for granted, so much so that sometimes I do not feel her absence strange.

Dear Mummy

I am the gate; whoever enters through me will be saved. – John 10:9

Dear Mummy,

Thank you for being the mum that we always take for granted for. Every time without fail, even after a tired day at work, you help us wash our clothes, clean the house, cook our meals and iron our uniforms. Sorry for not being able to appreciate you enough and for not loving you enough. Words can never fully describe how much I love you and appreciate your sacrifice for our home.

Forgive me for not spending enough time with you, and not paying attention to you sometimes. I will always remember the good times spent with you, such as when we go to coffeeshop for breakfast, when we go on family tours overseas, and when we celebrate our birthdays at different restaurants.

I also remember that 5 years ago, I wrote a letter to you, saying, “I’m sharing you God’s love, because I love you too, and because I love you, I want to spend my life with you forever.”

I wish to let you know that I really appreciate all that you have done for us and that now, you can rest peacefully in heaven. I pray that you will know Jesus, and I eagerly wait for the day when I meet you in heaven again.


亲爱的妈妈,

谢谢你。每天,工作之后, 您帮助我们洗衣, 打扫房子, 烹饭和烙我们的衣服。很抱歉我没花很多时间来爱您。我说什么也不能形容我多莫爱你。

我会记得我们早上一起到咖啡店吃早餐的时刻,我们到国外游览的时刻,和我们庆祝生日的时刻。

我希望你能安心地在天堂。我会等那一天能在天堂遇见你。

Your beloved son,
Colin